Lucky number 30!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

That's right!

I'M PREGNANT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

We got the official news from my RE on Friday 8/17/07, and I still don't think it has hit me yet. It still doesn't seem real. I'm actually a bit disappointed in myself about my reaction. I expected to be bawling like a baby - I do that, I get it from my Mom.

I haven't shed a tear yet, which is REALLY not like me. I think part of me still doesn't believe it and the part that does is terrified that something will go wrong.

So, for all the details, I had a sneaking suspicion (or hopeful thinking) last Wednesday that I might be, so I woke up at like 5 am and took a test. I honestly thought it was negative, but decided to take one final look, and low and behold, there was a line!!! I had to go wake Kevin up to take a look and make sure I wasn't imagining it. He saw it too!!!! So, if I was crazy, so was he. :-)

I kept testing (twice a day, even) from then until my first beta on Friday 8/17, and the lines just got darker and darker (I have quite a collection now!).

Every time I go to the RE for my pregnancy tests, my sweet, sweet nurse, Carla, always asks in her perpetually hopeful voice, "Do you have anything you need to tell me?". And my answer is always and pitiful little "no". Well, sure enough on Friday, she asked again while she was pulling my records up on the computer. Along with Carla, we also had Nancy - the office manager, in the blood room helping with paperwork since Carla was the only nurse on duty that day. When she asked, I quietly said "I think so...". It was the BEST reaction ever!

Nancy's head whipped around and she mouthed (you have to remember we're in a fertility clinic, so we always have to be sensitive to the other patients who may have not received the news they were hoping for) "ARE YOU PREGNANT?!?!". All I could do was grin and nod. Carla actually cried. About that time Dr. Bates was walking down the hall and Nancy stuck her head out and gave him a "thumbs up", so then he comes in, grinning from ear to ear. He asked if I'd tested and home, and I sheepishly told him, I'd taken five (it's actually eight, but I didn't want him to think I was obsessed or anything). He laughed out loud and said "You could have stopped at 4". You have NO idea how much joy it brought me to see their reactions. I had started getting used to the idea, but for them, this was news. I realized then that they've got some tough jobs - they always have to present this hopeful and positive attitude and they're constantly delivering bad news, watching women cry, seeing them stressed to the max, and it's moments like that one when it all works, that they really get to see how much what they do day in and day out impacts the women (and men) they work with.

So, I've had two betas now...the first came in at 65, the second at 183, which is great. We were looking for the numbers to double and they almost tripled. I go in tomorrow for one final beta to make sure my hCG levels are still rising at the rate they should be. Carla said we'd do the first ultrasound at 6 weeks, so I'm hoping to get to see something next week. Everyone is already placing their bets as to whether we have one or two in there. In addition to the family history of twins, we KNOW we triggered two eggs, so there is a good possibility, though my gut says it's just one. I'll be shocked if there are two!

We've told immediate family and close friends (except for Kevin's parents, so if you know them, PLEASE don't say anything yet) and I expect to tell more people once I see the heartbeat, hopefully next week.

Kevin commented the other day that he didn't realize how great the strain of this struggle was until it was over. And he's right, I had NO idea I had that much weight on my shoulders.

Please keep us in your prayers that everything will continue to progress well. I have no reason to think it won't, but after taking 2 1/2 years to get here, I'm scared to DEATH that something will happen. I hope to breath easier with each milestone, so hopefully I won't drive everyone around me nuts.